When’s the best time to start a blog about intimacy and your body? When you’ve become completely disconnected from it.
Emma, I am is a personal blog about intimacy and body image from a woman who has lost touch with her own body. This isn’t a place for advice but rather for exploration. This is my journey to figuring out how I can get back on track with loving my body and my intimate life.
About a year ago, my problems with intimacy started. I lost all sense of desire. My best description of what befell me is that the prospect of having sex stopped naturally occurring to me. Now whether solo or partnered, sometimes I feel neutral, sometimes I have no interest, and other times it’s the last thing on my mind.
Most of the time, I don’t want to have sex, but I really want to want to. It’s a source of tension and strain in my relationship. I wish I could flip a switch and go back to feeling normal.
I want my old fire back. I’m someone who used to think that a key pillar of my identity was that I was very sexually driven. Now, I don’t know.
I’ve been pretending to be turned on for so long that I don’t know what turns me on anymore. When my boyfriend asks me what feels good, I don’t always know the answer.
If any other women out there are going through the same things, hopefully, this blog can serve as a place where you can read, laugh, cry, and think “That’s how I feel, too!”